We had very little on the agenda for today, which is how some people like to\nspend every day of their holiday, but for us, it’s something of an exception.<\/p>\n\n
We get up earlier and do many more things when on holiday than when we’re at\nhome; and the same was true when we both had jobs, before you ask.<\/p>\n\n
We awoke to a better view today. The sand has died down, but it’s still a little hazy. At least we were able to see Palm Jumeirah through the floor-to-ceiling windows this morning, or one or two of its fronds, in any case.<\/p>\n\n
After a refreshing shower under the four jets of our lovely shower cubicle, breakfast was taken in the Al\nIwan<\/a> restaurant. It was a\nfantastic buffet spread, but didn’t quite manage to justify the exorbitant\nprice.<\/p>\n\n Really, the only way to deal with a place like this is to enjoy yourself and\nlook at your credit card statements when they arrive. If you studiously\nanalyse every bill you sign for, you’re going to put yourself on edge pretty\nquickly and taint the experience for yourself. It’s better to indulge in the\nmoment, try not to think too much about the cost, and then just look back on\nthe place with fond memories after the fact.<\/p>\n\n After breakfast, we collected complimentary vouchers for the Wild\nWadi<\/a> water park and had one of the buggies ferry us\ndown to the park.<\/p>\n\n I’ve never been to a water park before, but I suspect that this is a good one.\nI enjoyed it immensely, at least.<\/p>\n\n When we arrived, it was a shockingly low 20°C. I couldn’t believe it. Just\nbefore we left the hotel, it had even rained for a few minutes. We were\nactually worried that we might be cold at the park.<\/p>\n\n It’s best to come early, especially at the weekend, as it can get busy very\nquickly. Luckily for us as guests at the hotel, we were able to enter at\n10:00, one hour before the park officially opens. This helps one beat the\ncrowds.<\/p>\n\n Eloïse wasn’t too sure about the family ride, which involved sitting in a\nlarge paddling pool and being blasted around a water chute by fast-moving\nwater. It wasn’t anything wild, but Eloïse didn’t much care for the\nexperience, possibly because the splashes of water were cold, moreso when the\nbreeze then blew across you.<\/p>\n\n As the morning wore on, the sun started to put in an appearance and both the\nair and water temperature started to rise.<\/p>\n\n The Jumeirah Sceirah (read: scarer) is the ultimate ride in the park, a huge\nslide that plunges you 33 metres at 80 kmh over three or four seconds.\nThe ride has no deep water, so it’s perfect for me, as I still can’t swim. All\nyou need is a head for heights and a stomach for the speed and steepness of\nthe descent.<\/p>\n\n I climbed the tower of the ride, which offered excellent views of the Burj Al\nArab. Warning signs on the way cautioned the prospective rider to “know his\nown limits” and be aware that “swimsuits may be pulled off by water force”.<\/p>\n\n Atop the tower, I climbed into position and prepared for the descent. Sarah\nwaited for me at the base, along with Eloïse. I was told to cross my arms\nand feet, in a kind of pharaoh position. Presumably, this prevents something\ngetting wrenched painfully on the way down.<\/p>\n\n Anyway, I did as I was told and nudged myself into motion. The first second or\nso was easy, but before you can even think about what might be coming next,\nyou are plunged over steep humps in the ride, your stomach lurching and your\nbody becoming weightless as you feel yourself lifting slightly out of the\nchute. At this point, you can’t even see anything, because the water is\nblasting into your face so quickly. The view is rather like that from behind\nthe windscreen of a car going through a car-wash.<\/p>\n\n An involuntary yell found its way out of my mouth and I found myself\nsubmitting to whichever fate awaited me. Amazingly, my body weight suddenly\nreturned, my speed slowed, the view cleared and it was all over.<\/p>\n\n If I make it sound improbably exciting, believe me, that’s how I personally\nexperienced it.<\/p>\n\n Sarah didn’t fancy the look of the Jumeirah Sceirah and Eloïse didn’t\nwant to be parted from Mama, but I persuaded Sarah to have a go on one of the\nuphill roller-coaster rides. Sarah jumped in an inflatable ring and was\nlaunched up a chute and off to god knows where. It was a good ten minutes\nbefore she returned, having enjoyed the experience immensely.<\/p>\n\n It was coming up on the small one’s nap time, so we went back to the hotel and\nchanged for lunch. We headed down to Souk Madinat\nJumeirah<\/a> and ate outside at a\nwaterside table. The setting was gorgeous and the sun was now blazing. It was\na comfortable 23°C or so.<\/p>\n\n We went looking for presents in the souq and then, when Eloïse finally\nwoke up, we took her to the Jumeirah Hotel’s children’s park. I didn’t stay\nlong, however, and returned to the hotel to relax. I also wanted to check out\nsome of the hotel’s boutiques, just for fun. I was shown a €283,000\n(±$340,000) watch. Cool; I’ll take four of them. Put them on my tab.<\/p>\n\n At this point, I’m now recognised by some of the security staff at the\neuphemistically named Welcome Centre (Fuck Off Centre might be a better\nsobriquet, as it exists primarily to keep people out) and they wave me and my\nbuggy driver through.<\/p>\n\n It’s amazing to be staying at a hotel that has become a tourist attraction in\nits own right. Busloads of tourists are constantly pulling up just short of\nthe security checkpoint, so that the occupants can pile out, take a few\nphotos, and then reboard and move to the next stop on the sightseeing tour.<\/p>\n\n Ordinary folk need to call 24 hours in advance if they want to visit this\nhotel. If allowed to visit, they’ll be met and given a short tour before\nhaving to leave again.<\/p>\n\n Guests of other Jumeirah<\/a> properties, on the other\nhand, can come here at set times during the day for a nose around and a few\nphotos. Outside of those hours, however, the Burj is a sanctuary for its\nresidents.<\/p>\n\n It’s strange to be on the inside looking out. When all’s said and done, it’s\nstill only a hotel, but the experience is definitely unlike any other and I’m\nvery grateful for the privilege of being able to undergo it.<\/p>\n\n If you can afford to spend a couple of days here, you’ll definitely go home\nwith lasting memories. It would make a wonderful honeymoon destination, for\nexample, perhaps for a couple of days en route to somewhere further afield.<\/p>\n\n My only complaints about the place are very minor. I can’t print from the\nin-room laptop, for example. I’ll live. Neither of our ordered newspapers\nturned up today, either; it turns out they’re unavailable, so the huge\ncomplimentary newspaper list suddenly becomes a lot less impressive.<\/p>\n\n One of the boutiques on the ground floor sells Burj-branded products of every\ndescription, including a couple of interesting-looking CDs. However, no way is\noffered to actually hear these CDs before buying and, unsurprisingly, they’re\nunavailable elsewhere and more expensive than normal CDs. There’s a DVD about\nthe hotel on sale, too. Its asking price of about €20 doesn’t seem\nunreasonable until you check the playing length and see that the DVD lasts a\nwhole ten minutes. Sorry, we might be a little indulgent from time to time,\nbut we’re not that<\/strong> giddy.<\/p>\n\n Dinner was a buffet at the hotel’s Al\nIwan<\/a> once again. The food was\ngreat, but not stellar. The bill, of course, was<\/strong> astronomical. If it\nsounds like I’m complaining, I’m really not. The ambience was lovely and the\nservice friendly and extremely attentive. They won’t even let you pour your\nown coffee from the pot around here. Even the sugar lumps are plonked into\nyour coffee by Christofle tongs operated by someone else’s hand.<\/p>\n\n Seriously, you’re almost afraid to scratch your arse around here, in case someone dives in from the sidelines to do it for you.<\/p>\n\n So, this is how the other half live, eh? I told Sarah yesterday that I could\nquickly get used to this. Today, I feel like I am<\/strong> used to it.<\/p>\n\n But not altogether; it’s still an entertaining novelty, a fun thing to do, a\nprivilege and not something to overindulge in. I would say it’s a\nonce-in-a-lifetime experience, but I can<\/strong> imagine returning at some point\nin the future, albeit briefly again.<\/p>\n\n For bedtime, we’ve taken the plunge and ordered the premium down quilt for\nourselves and the child’s down pillow for Eloïse. These are\ncomplimentary, before you accuse us of taking leave of our senses.<\/p>\n\n Tomorrow is our final full day at the Burj and we have nothing at all\nplanned, which is the ideal schedule for our last day.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" We had very little on the agenda for today, which is how some people like to spend every day of their holiday, but for us, it’s something of an exception. We get up earlier and do many more things when … Continue reading